Tom and I are likely to come to blows this week.
By that I mean I am going to knock his block off if he doesn’t shift this grey, angry, miserable mood he is walking around in. He is unbearable.
With less than a week to the Summer holidays I keep telling myself he is tired and possibly a little hormonal but I swear if this carries on once the holidays start he will not be returning to year 8.
It hasn’t been a great week so far.
Monday I felt bloody dreadful, I am not sure if I have mentioned before that I can not tolerate wine. Wine makes me ill, even the smallest amount can give me terrible headaches. Why? I don’t know. However, this known fact does not seem to stop me drinking it on occasion and it really bloody should.
I had two glasses off what I think, was a fairly average white wine Sunday evening and for the most part on Monday I felt like there was a workman inside my head trying to split my brain in two with a jack hammer. Not ideal on a work day.
Granted I was tired, after another very successful date with Mr Ivy I slept really badly as I replayed the whole thing out in my head for most of the 7 and a half hours that I should have been sleeping. There were constant movie clips in my head, replayed in various different ways, obviously making myself much more witty and attractive in the retakes.
Over all it does seem people are much more grumpy this week. The patients have been dreadful and the staff have been worse, the air con is still not working and everyone is getting just a little bit techy, myself included.
The patients have suddenly realised the holidays are upon us and are rushing around in a blind panic trying to arrange everything necessary in the last few days before they have to drag small children around with them wherever they go, it happens every holiday.
Yesterday was a protected learning time afternoon. In layman’s terms this is training, usually the kind that is repetitive and not entirely useful.
The only plus side is a free lunch but in all honesty the free lunch wasn’t even worth the two hours of training that came afterwards. To hold a crowd you really do have to have a certain something, the topic either has to be interesting enough for you to be completely boring or you need to inject some oomph in to it and make it entertaining, unfortunately for all of us, we didn’t get either.
The speaker, a seemingly lovely GP from, I don’t even recall where, was hardly the life and soul, his voice was monotone and quiet in what was a very large room and he fidgeted, a lot. I was much more focused on his fidgeting than I was on what he was saying, even when I could hear him but the annoying thing is that we have had quite a few of these PLT’s now and they always seem to be about the same thing.
Please if anyone is listening could we have some variety. I swear if I hear the word ‘signpost’ one more time this year I will spontaneously combust.
According to ‘figures’ we are an overweight nation of alcoholic chain smokers and as such we need to be pointed away from our GP surgeries to more lifestyle based services, of which there are plenty. Now it is becoming very common for people with low-level mental health and or lifestyle issues to be pointed towards counselling services and self-referral services such as Mind and One You and while in principle I agree that there is a certain amount of self-help people can invest in, it is not an easy message to send in a world where we have become very dependant on quick fixes and medication.
It is of course a bigger picture than I paint and on the whole the lifestyle you lead can impact on your health so, the idea that if you fix the lifestyle you reduce the risk to your health is one that I think most people are aware of, what is harder to acknowledge however, is the support required to achieve it.
Personally I think it is a little like locking the stable door after the horse has bolted.
In an ideal world we would all do our bit to maintain a healthy, fit and active life. In reality we all have days where actually only a large Vodka and a bag of Kettle chips is going to make us feel better. I have a few of those a week usually.
I hope, in the long run (if all goes to plan) that these services are made much more readily available to anyone who wants to use them, counselling, respiratory singing choirs, fit for free programmes, anything that makes people feel good and feel better that gets them off medication and back in the game and in turn takes the pressure of the NHS. At least until a new pressure comes along anyway.
One thing I did learn from the training was that to lose 1 lb you have to eat 1350 calories less.
I read something a while back about learning moments. Every now and then you have them, someone will say something or you will read something, just a fact or something relevant to you that will stick in your head and you will never forget it. This is what is called a learning moment, apparently.
Well that was my learning moment.
It seems a lot to me, as someone who is usually on a diet, ok not a diet necessarily but is always watching what I eat. I put on weight easily I imagine because I am not overly energetic, plus I like my snacks and my Vodka, so that’s me isn’t it, two vodkas and a bag of kettle chips and I’m not losing any weight this week! Kind of obvious but not, a weird light bulb moment.
There is nothing quite like getting up close and personal with someone new to make you slightly more body conscious than usual either, so the Kettle chips are definitely going to have to go.
The thought of getting naked in a new relationship is enough to put you off food forever.
Sunday afternoon while I was contemplating how much fruit is a reasonable amount to eat to stop the hunger pangs but not so much that you get wind and lathering my white bits in fake tan, just in case, I thought about the whole getting naked issue.
Oh sod the fruit. How much alcohol am I allowed before I become to floppy to participate? Oh yes that’s right, I can’t have any bloody alcohol because I am driving!
Mr Ivy is turning out to be quite one of the nicest surprises I have had a long time though. Keeping my head above water and my heart out of the equation I think I could like him, for a while. He makes me feel all warm inside. Even I rolled my eyes at that!
The other surprise I have just had is Tom’s return from his friends with another smashed iPhone!
I am hanging on by a thread.